Mommy lessons

Remember how it was the first day you started a new job? How out of sync with everyone else in your department you were? You needed to learn the processes of how things were done, the hierarchies, the locations of all the conference rooms and, most importantly, where the coffee pot was located.

Now, do you remember how it was when you started your first day as an official parent, carrying home your swaddled, mewling bundle of joy?

Pretty rough, wasn’t it? Those hours of sleep that you never saw, the two or three times in the night that you were awakened, the trials of figuring out just how to get that diaper on right. But as with any job, the more you did it, the better things got. You got into the swing of things, you learned the processes and you learned the temperament of your boss.

Yes, the diaper-wearing, baby powder scented boss especially.

Some of you moms out there are celebrating yet another Mother’s Day. Some of you may be celebrating your very first. For you, I bid you a hearty welcome to the new sisterhood of Mommies.

Regardless of whether this is your first or your fiftyth, every day is a learning process. You’ll rarely have the same day twice on this roller coaster ride. Sometimes the ride is maddening and exacerbating. Sometimes it’s exciting and full of laughter.

To celebrate Mother’s Day, here’s a list of some of the things I’ve learned since I became a mom. Please feel free to add your own.

- Those little mini chocolate bars you give out at Halloween are perfect for rewards (BRIBES!) for chores done around the house.

- Coffee is your friend. Coffee is important. Caffeine was put on this earth for a reason - to keep us running all day long and to give Starbucks something to sell.

- Learn to be a morning person. ‘Cause you’ll be one, whether you like it or not.

- Every meal doesn’t have to be completely nutritionally balanced. Kids won’t remember what they ate that night, but they will remember how much fun they had at the table being with you.

- Some things are, just simply, beyond your control. The sooner you accept it and get over it, the saner (is that even a word? More importantly, is there such a thing?) you’ll be

- Don’t set your standards and expectations too high. They hurt you and everyone else around you when they fall.

- I can make almost any kid laugh by just acting like a goofball. Who cares what other people thinks around you? The laughter and joy of the child is the most important thing. Goofball can be liberating.

- The memory of good days are to be kept in reserve for bad days.

- Multi tasking is the only way to get things done. Just make sure you don’t mix the electrical stuff, like computers, with the water stuff, like dishes.

- Prioritize. Put the things you want to get done the most at the top of your list and be realistic. Because chances are that your travel companion to the grocery store, bank, post office, hair stylist, mall, etc. will have other plans for your list.

- Always remember to try to take some time for yourself to recharge, even if it’s something simple like doing the groceries by yourself or getting a cup of coffee. You are no good for your kids or yourself if you’re exhausted and wiped out, both physically and mentally.

- The dishes can wait. They’ll be there later. The beautiful sunny weather and the opportunity to make bubbles in the backyard might not be.

- The best presents are those that are handmade with love, glue, paper and lots of painty fingerprints all over the walls.

- Cookies are made yummier when made together.

- The best toy is not the toy. It’s the box that it came in.

- The prettiest bouquet is the handful of freshly picked, bright yellow dandelions. Daddy will probably appreciate the weeding help too.

- You can try to take your kid everywhere, try to get them involved in everything and have them do everything you want them to do, but the best and happiest moment, for you and them, is that moment that you get to spend together one-on-one. Even if it is for just a moment.

Have a wonderful Mother’s Day, everyone.